frosty

Sometime in my early adult life I've acquired this "I'll show them" way of life. Be it binge drinking, binge smoking, or just generally exuding a completely erratic behavior that shocked even the most unpredictable of my peers, always 'one-upping' them. It is now that I see I've turned this motto to the straight - edge areas of my life. Job-wise, never completely satisfied, trying to win a competition with myself, or with what my parents thought I would do with my life. Unfortuately there is only a few people, my relatives excluded that really know me right now. It is not supposed to be a rebellious statement either. I'm just saying. The more I get to know myself, the less of a grip I have on what I'm capable of, what kinds of extreme situations I'm willing to handle without a complete meltdown. I have to pat myself on the back, I've been pretty fucking hardworking and patient, and even with my head in the clouds most of the time, I found myself to be quite persistent.
Reading Fran Lebowitz right now so I'll just end by quoting her: "Spilling your guts is just exactly as charming as it sounds".

Here's to my new obsession, Emmanuelle Alt. One sexy underdog.