Alone in a cabin, 3 days - kafka on the shore.

It rains hard a couple times, but doesn't last, and each time I run outside, naked, to wash myself.

Sometimes I get all sweaty excercising, rip off my clothes, and sunbathe on the porch.

I drink a lot of tea and concentrate on reading, sitting on the porch or by the stove.

Books on history, science, folklore, mythology, sociology, psychology, Shakespeare, you name it.

Instead of racing straight through, I reread the parts I think are most important till I understand them,

To get something tangible out of them.

All sorts of knowledge seeps, bit by bit, into my brain.

I imagine how great it'd be to stay here as long as I wanted,

There are lots of books on the shelf I'd like to read, still plenty of food.

But I know I'm just passing through and will have to leave before long.

This place is too calm, too natural - too complete.

I don't deserve it.

At least not yet.

girl on train

Her complexion clear, smooth, fresh and uninterrupted. Her cheeks rosy from the usual rush of the morning commute. Her simple clothes, spotless. Solid, primary colors. Cowboy boots! Solid thick leather tote.
Nothing fancy; sharp yet soft. Couldn't stop looking at her. So comfortable in her own skin.

Sunday/Monday

This past Sunday Bear and myself were playing hosts - on a small scale. I thawed out some croissants overnight, then baked them into golden perfection (thank you Trader Joe's for your amazing frozen goods selection; sans the goat cheese swirls  - where IS the goat cheese?). A perfect morning: cup of coffee in one hand, homemade pastry in the other.

**

**

This morning I wake up nice and early, scrub myself squeaky clean, dress the part to meet with a potential employer...

On my way back, a woman chases me down the street asking me about my current work experience and education, offering to call me up and arrange a meeting. That was a frst for me. I couldn't help thinking this is such a Haruki Murakami moment: a dream - like life events, whether it's a sudden disappearance of your significant other or letting yourself completely fade away down in a well, anything's fair game. 

                                                      

"Looking up at the dawn stars from the bottom of a well was a special experience, very different from looking at the full, starry sky on a mountaintop, as if my mind - my self - my very existence - were firmly bonded through my narrow window to each one of those stars in the sky. I felt a deep sense of intimacy toward them: they were my stars, visible to no one but me, down here in the dark well. I embraced them as my own, and they in turn showered me with a kind energy and warmth." The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

my favorite things

**

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad

**

 

cabbage rose

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Drearily walking to work this very frosty morning, I passed by an unexpected array of organic produce, artisan bread, full-grown mushrooms, not to mention the romantic dirty buckets full of fresh flowers. That’s right, a farmer’s market right in the middle of a stiff ass downtown Chicago. I could smell the different notes as I kept on walking, one sniff at a time.

Μέδουσα

my self protects me, perks me up when unexpected. i guess thats the case with everyone. or not. really enjoyed doing this one. cheers

!excited!

about life's possibilities, about potential ballet or yoga class with a dear friend of mine, about volunteering this morning, washing their towels so they can take a proper shower, about dispensing lunch for them, about my coffee this very morning, about this wonderful apartment and love that lives within these walls. About him sleeping so sweet, unaware of how delicious he looks to me. ABOUT that tree outside in the courtyard, about the Lawrence bus packed with tired people at whom i will be smiling and they'll smile back (or they did last week). i love my life. but im superstitious. ah.

perfume oil

im learning to appreciate every little thing or event that comes my way - anticipated or not. 'treat it as an opportunity' i tell myself. it takes a bit of energy to retrain my chain of thought, but eventually it will become automatic, i hope. inspiration takes me there. i deal with things.